Monday, April 13, 2009

Martinis and Rednecks...What a Night!

Friday night my BFF had a free pass. She is a wife and mother of two. When she gets a "free pass" that means she gets the night out with girlfriends, and even gets to spend the night at my house so she can sleep off a bit of the hangover that she usually wakes up with before facing the kids.

BFF decided that for this particular Friday night she wanted to go to a certain bar and listen to a certain band. The bar is awful AND the band is awful. Well, the band is actually talented and all that...but it's the crowd they bring. Blech! Anyway, I begged and pleaded....but alas....she won. I was able to convince her to go to a downtown happy hour for some martinis and such before we entered the land of the redneck (ie. mullets, jorts, etc.). She signed on, and we headed out for martinis. Two of our friends, Stevie and Pixie, joined us for happy hour. I love time with my girlfriends, and we all had stories to share and much to catch up on.

Fast forward to the awful bar. When we arrived we were told there was a $10 cover charge to see the awful band. Booooo..... I was digging in my purse to find $10 when the largest man I have ever seen in my life (who also happens to be the bouncer at the awful bar) states that if we all sit on his lap and take pictures, we can get in for free. Seriously? Yes, seriously. I looked at BFF and said "I believe I would rather pay $10". By this time she had a good buzz and says "No way! We are so sitting on his lap and getting in for free." She proceeds to drag me over to the largest man I have ever seen in my life and shove me onto his lap. Try smiling pretty for that one!

We got inside and huddled together. Almost immediately creepy people try to interact with us. We commence doing shots, and try not to have eye contact with anyone. After the shots have kicked in the band plays a few good songs. We made our way to the dance floor and tried to make the best of it. At one point I looked around and realized that I was surrounded by bra straps, chest hair, jorts and gold chains. I couldn't deal. I bolted. I'm a bad friend. I know. I just couldn't do it.


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