Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The Voice of Reason

The voice of reason has finally spoken. Well, it actually e-mailed.

I've never been a dater, per se. I explained earlier that my previous relationship MO is that I simply like a guy, he likes me back and we become boyfriend/girlfriend. There really hasn't been a lot of effort involved. We never went on dates to assess our compatibility or anything. We just hung out in a group of friends for a while and decided we liked each other. This is where I'm somewhat handicapped in the dating arena. I'm pretty much scared to death. If you have been keeping up with this blog you probably already know that. You have probably noticed that I seem to question ever single move I make. Even if I don't like someone at all, I continue to go out with them. I have been trying to adhere to this 3-strike rule I've been given because I don't seem to trust myself. I've gone completely bananas.

The voice of reason read my blog and e-mailed me with her thoughts. This voice of reason is someone I like a lot, and truly respect. She has been there people. I mean really BEEN THERE. She's done what I'm doing. She's dated. She's said goodbye to men she met for the simple fact that she really wasn't feeling a connection. Some of them were good guys. Just not for her. She didn't force herself to stick to a 3-strike rule, and she says I really need to learn to trust myself. She said all of this very kindly, and even shared with me some of her experiences. It meant a lot to me. What means the most is the knowledge that she has finally found her Mr. Right. She hung in there and found him. She didn't even have to go out with him 4 times to realize they were a good match. She knew the first time she met him that she like him.

I'm going to make a promise here tonight. I'm going to promise you (and most importantly myself) that from here on out I'm going to trust my instincts. I am no longer that broken girl who ended things with Mr. Right because I wasn't ready for him yet. I know that, and I'm going to trust my knowledge of that.

Thank you voice of reason. Thank you for being the light at the end of my tunnel. Thank you for reminding me that I really can trust myself. I'm truly grateful.


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